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BURNOUT

burnout

noun

burn·​out | \ ˈbərn-ˌau̇t \

1: the cessation of operation usually of a jet or rocket engine also : the point at which burnout occurs
2a: exhaustion of physical or emotional strength or motivation usually as a result of prolonged stress or frustration  
b: a person suffering from burnout

HELLO, my dear readers.

I hope you are all having an amazing day. Can you believe it is already the middle of February? Wow! There are so many incredible things just around the corner, and I can’t wait to hear your updates and read your blog posts.

Today’s blog post is going to be a little different. This is going to be an “emotions” post, where I update you guys on how I am feeling in life and whatnot. Writing has always been a therapeutic activity for me, as I’m sure it is for you, and I love being able to use this outlet to jot out my thoughts and receive feedback from you guys. Thank you, as always, for your gracious comments and prayers for me. ❤

And without further ado, I’ll just state it simply: I’m on the verge of burnout.

Burnout is a terrible feeling. It’s when things aren’t going your way, and you find that the things that once made you happy aren’t doing you justice anymore. It’s ruthless and powerful.

As humans we experience a wave of emotions. Sometimes we’re propelled into outer space, we’re so happy; others we are in valleys void of water, and droughts bloom in our hearts. Though I think we all hate the droughts while we’re in them, it makes that taste of water that much better. Growth isn’t possible without both highs and lows, and this is something I try to focus on when I’m on the verge of burnout.

So what’s going on? Why am I feeling this way?

I can trace the beginning of it to last week, when my friend group got into a massive argument. While things are better now, this argument exposed a deep fracture in these relationships, and as an INFP I have been really affected by how things are not what I thought they were. I value loyalty and friendship above most things, but not when it destroys my happiness.

These thoughts may seem harsh, but I cannot stand drama. As a person who always takes the middle of the road approach, I’ve found myself on a ledge where no one else is. From being in the middle, I have found myself pulled in two directions, and I’m tired of it. I’m sick of the sting of selfishness. And people are the way they are.

Though I want to find fault in others, I know part of the blame belongs to me for how I handle things. I allow people to walk all over me, because I want to help others in all I can, though this causes pain and hurt in my own walk. We can only carry so much before collapse. I’m sure some of you guys can relate.

As a result of this friend group problem, I have started to analyze the situations around me. There are certain aspects of my life that are absolutely incredible, things I would never change, but there are others that leave seeds of doubt in my brain. I hate wasted time, and I feel as if a lot of it is vanishing before my eyes.

However, I value so many relationships outside of this situation, the people who have listened to me talk nonstop about these frustrations. My family is an integral part of this, and without them I know things would be so much worse. Plus, you guys have also contributed to helping me through this state of anger, and again it means the world to me that you have chosen to listen. 🙂

And to clarify… Flying has given me an outlet to escape my college world. It is the thing that keeps me grounded right now, though the weather has been pretty terrible in Southern California in the past few months. However, the sun always comes out in the end!

If you guys are also going through burnout, just know that eventually it will end, and things will return to normal. However, we have to be willing to do things to relax our frazzled brains. We have to repair ourselves in order to find happiness, and if this means cutting out certain relationships or activities, we must do it to gain ourselves once more.

The truth: Things will change.

Until next time,

-K.

P.S. Life is great. Though I am hurt in some aspects, I am very happy in others! ❤

IMG_4271.jpg
Baby Katie: This pretty much describes how I feel right now. 🙂

 

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25 thoughts on “BURNOUT”

  1. I really liked the point that you started to analyze the things. This really helps to figure out the exact problem and how to curb it up. I do this too….
    You’re just going on the right way. Just keep going with respect to time.
    This is also the rule of Buddha – Everything Changes.
    I have also been passed through these kind of tough times, but now I’m experienced in this. 😉
    You’ve got the experience too now which will help you to face the next level situations. ☺☺
    So proud of you.. ❤❤
    (by the way, a sweet kissi-missi to little katie… 😘😘😘)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I always find that a walk in the woods….commuting with nature…usually recharges my batteries and calms the mind. My wife’s way of “grounding” herself is a walk on the grass in bare feet.
    OR you can always try the old Star Wars Mantra “I am one with the force and the force is one with me” 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love this so much. 🙂 Thank you so much for your supportive words. There is something amazing about the natural world we’ve been given, and I think our society can easily forget this in the modern day. But I will make sure to use your tips in the future. Nature is definitely a method of recharging!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. ‘It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.’
    Epictetus.
    Second time today I use this quote, for different reasons.

    Take a deep breath, things are not that bad, bu it can be really bad if we over react, and do foolish things, in the heat of the moment.
    First cool down, and with a clear head take action.
    Good luck! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. May as well read the Enchiridion or Manual of Epictetus, is a short manual of Stoic ethical advice compiled by Arrian, a 2nd-century disciple of the Greek philosopher Epictetus.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I can so relate to what you are going through right now. I am going through the same things with significant other and I trading turns going to doctors, surgeries, illnesses, etc. Overwhelming and sometimes I want to just run away and fly off somewhere like a bird. Thank you for sharing and I hope yours goes away too soon. I guess it is a good thing, for once we are through it, the sun sure does look a lot brighter.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank you most kindly. Without these things happening, we would not appreciate the beautiful and peaceful days so much, we would not learn compassion for others, and we would not have such a truly meaningful walk in our journey with God.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I can relate to this so much – similar personality, similar thought process, similar experiences and similar reaction. Felt like it was me penning down everything that’s been bothering me but I’m so glad that I came across this post of yours. It’s a wonderful feeling to find someone like yourself in a distant land yet feel so close to them.

    It takes courage to write about these feelings and you did an amazing job. I sincerely wish that everything falls into place in your life. Friendship is a complicated thing but do remember one companion to share your life with, is much better than tens of friends who are indifferent to your feelings. Best of luck 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I hope you are doing better, and things only continue to improve in the coming days. Just know that it does eventually improve, even if we can’t control what happens.

      Thank you again for reading. ❤

      Liked by 2 people

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