poetry

PRIDE (a poem)

pride is a bubble blown
from lips dry with the
sound of my own words

pride is a balloon rising
into the sky with my
soul at the helm

pride is a humble POP!
when things fall apart
and i realize
i do not
know it
all

and what i know
means nothing
when my blood
has dried up


SUPERBIA*

a foolishly and irrationally corrupt sense of one’s personal value, status, or accomplishments  used synonymously with hubris. In Judaism, pride is called the root of all evil. -Wikipedia

According to the internet, the sin women struggle with most is pride (for men, it is lust. I am not the internet, so hopefully you don’t take offense to my claims). I know I am guilty of a hyper inflated pride at times, and this is why humility is a cure that must be cultured in response to this particular affliction.

In high school I read a play called Oedipus Rex by Sophocles that offered my first in-depth study of hubris, a term that “describes a personality quality of extreme or foolish pride or dangerous overconfidence.” In this play, Oedipus’s downfall culminates from his own ego. While the play has a fatal ending, we can examine our own lives under a similar (but hopefully not as dramatic) lens.

Have you ever been around a cocky person who seems to know it all? There’s a good chance you have. Maybe you are that person, and you don’t know it. The thing is, it’s okay to admit you don’t know it all, but when your ego inflates and inflates, it’s like a bubble (kudos to the poem above). Eventually the cockiness will expand to capacity, and the bubble, the balloon, the ego will pop–leaving damaged shreds of you in its wake.

Pride should be harnessed for motivation’s sake, as you must be willing to counter this ego problem with humility. A humble spirit is one that cares for others, the earth, and the self with a lens of emotion for the greater good, whereas pride asks its host to rely on the self.

What happens when one relies on the self? It may feel good for a while, because pride is a good feeling. But like most good feelings, there’s a timestamp, and then things are going to change. Eventually, a person will be knocked off his or her feet and forced to reexamine everything.

Consider your own heart today. Are you prideful? Is your heart consumed by pride? Learn to recognize your struggles, and combat them with humility.

*According to our good old friend the internet, there are two definitions of pride: One being the aforementioned negative “sin” on which I am writing, and the second as follows: “A humble and content sense of attachment toward one’s own or another’s choices and actions, or toward a whole group of people, and is a product of praise, independent self-reflection, and a fulfilled sense of belonging.” This second, positive vision of pride is not what we are discussing today.


DAY 7 OF THE SEVEN DAY CHALLENGE.

Can you guys believe we’re all ready at the conclusion of this challenge? I’m at a complete loss! Where did the time go?!?!

While I am sad that the week is gone, I am super excited to move into lighter territory. It’s time for some heavenly virtues! Beginning on Monday (which is tomorrow, yay!) we will dive into our hearts and look at the antitheses of these Seven Deadly Sins. We will dive in the Seven Heavenly Virtues that ask us to sift through our hearts with care and compassion for all.

Thank you guys for following me on this incredible journey! It has been wildly rewarding, much more than I can fully write.

Much love,

-K.


QUICK SHOUTOUT TO YOU GUYS!

Yesterday was my best viewed day since beginning my blog. Funnily enough, I had some stress from the prior days that made me say, “Screw it. I’m not writing a blog post today” (that post being the poem “Envy”). But my spirit rebounded, I wrote “Envy,” and published it that morning. All the sudden I was getting so many views from you guys (my favorite supporters!), and my heart soared.

I say this to remind anyone who is struggling out there to remember what you love doing. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise. Be yourself, and things will eventually fall into place, even if it doesn’t feel like that’s possible at first.

How do I know this?

You guys demonstrated that for me just yesterday. For that, I will always be appreciative.

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P.S. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BEST FRIEND AND BLOG SUPPORTER SINCE DAY 1, MISS GIVENCHY!!!

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poetry

ENVY (a poem)

i am envious of my innocence
and the things i knew not

i am envious of repentance
and the sins i forgot

but envy is an emerald flame
that will always burn hot


INVIDIA

occurs when a person lacks another’s superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it. –Wikipedia

Envy is a sin that rots away at our bone marrow like a flesh-eating bacterium. It’s nasty, grueling, and appalling–but it’s something that is innate to our human structure. While others may struggle with this more or less depending on their mindset, I’m sure we can all pinpoint a moment in which we realize, “Ah, what good is this doing me?”

I encourage you to consider how important on this planet you are. There is no one else like you, and this is a blessing to us all! We all have strengths and talents that will come to light, and it’s only you who can show us what that is.


DAY 6 OF THE SEVEN DAY CHALLENGE

Well, I apologize for this poem being so short. I had a bad headache yesterday (when I should have been writing this poem), and came up with this little guy quite on the spot. I promise tomorrow’s conclusion in this series (FINALLY!) will hopefully be more up to par with what I wish to produce for this blog.

Thank you for reading!<3

-K.

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poetry

WRATH (a poem)

is this the surface of the sun,
or the hot boil of my blood?

is this the rupture of my veins,
or the mighty dawn of a hurricane?

is this a clot in my heart,
or am i just falling apart?


IRA

is an intense emotional state. It involves a strong uncomfortable and hostile response to a perceived provocation, hurt or threat. -Wikipedia

Now I know we all have been here at some point or the other: Wrath is a destructive force with the power to tear us down within seconds of its activation. When we are consumed by our anger, bad things happen. We do and say things we don’t mean to the point of potentially harming ourselves or others.

Righteous anger is possible, but we must not let our rage eat away at our hearts for extended periods of time. Forgiveness is a requirement for us to sustain our hearts, and we must be willing to pause, take a breath, and remember our sanity. This is obviously easier stated than done, but it is true.

If you get angry today, take a deep breath. It’s going to be okay. Eventually wrath will dissolve into something that can be used for good.


DAY 5 OF THE SEVEN DAY CHALLENGE.

Only two more days to go! I am super excited to share the final two poems with you in this collection, and then we’re off to more positive imagery with the Seven Heavenly Virtues. After the conclusion of this two-week challenge, I don’t know what I’m going to do!

You guys are the best supporters, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart.

-K.

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poetry

SLOTH (a poem)

i want to do nothing
nothing at all

please turn of my lights
until i fall

asleep with my dreams
of nothing at all


ACEDIA

is a habitual disinclination to exertion, or laziness. -Wikipedia, our trusty source

Well, let me just share my superior level of sloth with you guys. It is the night before this post will go live, and my laziness is at quite the peak. This poem took me five seconds to write, and I’m honestly too lazy (too much like a real sloth) to write more.

Laziness can be a real detriment to our productivity. We have one life to live, with twenty-four hours in each day. A big chunk of this is gobbled up by work and other activities that we may or may not find enjoyable. So why waste any additional time to sloth? (Even when they are this cute. Look at the picture below, and you will know what I mean. For those of you who may not understand, sloth in English can mean either laziness or this cute little lazy animal.)

Maybe you enjoy being a couch potato. I know I do. But then I recognize how much time is wasted, and it really hurts. Our bodies desire a certain amount of relaxation, but we cannot give in to this ideology 24/7.


DAY 4 OF THE SEVEN DAY CHALLENGE.

Day 4 is already done. How? This is just a testament to the constant speed of time. We’re now halfway done with the Seven Deadly Sins challenge, which means there are only three poems left in this series.

Thank you as always for reading, and be on the lookout for tomorrow’s poem!

Much love,

-K.

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poetry

GREED (a poem)

greed sickens me
everywhere i look

someone passes by,
just another crook

but there i am,
eyes in the mirror

and my heart drops,
things become clearer

i am guilty,
guilty as charged

chain my wrists,
sound the alarm

i open my mouth,
taste all this sin

“tread lightly, my dear,
or the devil will win.”


AVARITIA

is the inordinate or insatiable longing for material gain, be it food, money, status, or power. -Wikipedia, the source of knowledge LOL

Greed, greed, greed. The stereotypes suggest that greed is most prevalent in the upper echelon of society, where the rich and fabulous only grow more rich and fabulous as time goes on. I associate this with Manhattan and Malibu and mansions and maids. But guess what? I’d bet all my money (which isn’t that much, I’m afraid) that we all struggle with this Deadly Sin.

Greed is a core flaw in our hearts. We want more, and we think we deserve more in all we do. And once we complete a goal or task, we’re likely to push even harder to climb the ladder another rung higher. While motivation and hard work can be a great thing, greed is not. It requires a certain amount of selfish energy coupled with sinful desires. Greed asks its inhabitant to put everything on the bottom shelf–except the self, because the self is the only thing on which to rely.


DAY 3 OF THE SEVEN DAY CHALLENGE.

There you have it! Day 3’s done. Only four more poems to go in the Seven Deadly Sins challenge, and then we’ll head to some lighter, more positive virtue poems! I’m really excited to share those with you all as well–especially so we can have a more sunshiny tone on this blog again.

Thank you all for your support. ❤

Until next time,

-K.

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poetry

GLUTTONY (a poem)

There’s a lump in my stomach
that should not be. It spindles
and spindles a web within me.

I eat and I eat until I can eat
no more, but this does not matter
to me; I’m not that poor.

Not like those who have nothing,
their stomachs rotted; yet I feast
and drink, my arteries clotted.

And then I’m aware of the raw,
complicit truth: Gluttony, oh
Gluttony! You make me uncouth.

You’re a craving my swollen body
wishes to remain, but my sojourner’s
spirit sighs slowly: “Not this again.”


GULA

(Latin for “to gulp down or swallow”) means over-indulgence and over-consumption of food, drink, or wealth items, particularly as status symbols. -Wikipedia once more

Gluttony, oh gluttony! You make me uncouth. And if we’re being honest, you strip me of my youth!

When I think of gluttons, my mind first heads on over to the movie Seven, a 1995 thriller starring Brad Pitt and the legendary Morgan Freeman. It’s a murder story revolving around the Seven Deadly Sins (gasp!), and the glutton in the story is a big poppa man, someone who has over-indulged himself to death.

But the truth is that I commit the sin of gluttony every day. I overeat sometimes. I drink way too much Diet Coke. What’s worse? Sometimes I can’t finish my meal and waste food that should be going to help others who are not as fortunate. And when I’m not overeating or drinking in excess, I’ll bet you I’m as gluttonous as they come when it comes to consumption in general. More, more, more! is the motto here in the Western World, where capitalism is king. Though I am forever indebted to capitalism, indulging our palates can sometimes lead to our downfall (which reminds me of pride, and we’re not quite there yet).


DAY 2 OF THE SEVEN DAY CHALLENGE.

Thank you guys for reading Day 2 of the Seven Day Challenge! Your response for yesterday’s “Lust” is overwhelmingly supportive, and I feel so blessed to be able to share my ramblings with you all. ❤ Much love!

Thank you again, and until next time,

-K.

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poetry

LUST (a poem)

dear lust,

i wish i could bottle you up
and stick you on the top
shelf of my closet, under
dirty clothes that i will
never wear and old paperbacks
that i will never read.

it’s not your fault
that you exist, that your
glow sizzles my skin.
in fact it is mine, and
i’ll bear it every day
that i should live.

because every time i catch
a breath of your scent
i remember the words
he told me, the things he said.
and i think to myself:
never again, never again.

but then you come back,
impossible to contain,
each thought of his voice
blackening my veins,
because i did not want for a body;
i lusted for a brain.

but the blood that
flows through me
holds my
shame.


LUXURIA

is the psychological force producing intense wanting or longing for an object, or circumstance fulfilling the emotion. Lust can take any form such as the lust for sexuality, love, money, or power. -Wikipedia (a great source lol)

As a human being I am prone to lusting after things I want. It’s a sin, and I know it well. No human is exempt from sin. We’re prone to going for things we (think that we) want, and this can destroy us in the process.

While I do not want to harp too long on lust, I just want to say that this poem is a representation of the sort of lust I have struggled with in the past. Typically I do not find myself drawn to a person based on physical traits; I’m after what’s going on in that mind of theirs, and then I have to remember to calm down and relax.

While I could definitely go off on a tangent about lust, I just want to leave you guys with this little snippet into my own interpretation of it. Maybe this is something a lot of you struggle with; maybe it isn’t. But I hope you guys can take something away from this poem and remember that there will be six more following this week.


DAY 1 OF SEVEN DAY CHALLENGE.

Aha! Day 1 is done. Now we have six more poems to follow, in which I will be continuing on with this segment of the Seven Deadly Sins. These next days will be filled with short blog posts like this one, and then I will eventually create a concluding blog post with my thoughts on the topic of sin and virtue. Maybe you will enjoy some of those ramblings from me.

Please remember to have a beautiful day! (It seems a little weird for me to say that after such an adult topic, but I do really want you to have a good day.)

Until tomorrow,

-K.

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poetry

do you think of me? (A POEM)

i think of you when
the clouds cry drops
of tears like my own,
each one a reminder
that you left, that you’re gone.

i think of you when
the sun bleeds me dry,
the rays a cosmic force
bent on burning my
cells to iron smithereens.

i think of you when
the wind picks up speed
and each gale weathers
my wet, burnt skin
with your memory.

i think of you often,
every thought like a
teardrop from the sky.
do you think of me,
or have i passed you by?


EXPLANATION?

With most poems I prefer to write some explanatory notes on why I chose my subject matter and whatnot. With this poem, I think I’d like to keep the backstory personal, and let you take away what you’d like from it.

I’ll leave it at that for today.

Until next time,

-A cryptic K.

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Flowers at a summer concert (Collierville, TN // June 2019)

 

poetry

in the midnight black (A POEM)

in the midnight black
nothing is as it seems
time is just a product
a product of your dreams

some men will bare their hearts
and others will stay silent
yet no matter your side
your heart will bleed violence

violence, violence against whom?
in this darkness i only see you


AN EXPLANATION.

There is a certain mystery that comes with the night. Instinctively we know that the darkness is a time for sleep and rest; yet there is much more symbolism to this magical time.

Though my favorite part of the day is the morning, I have always held a special appreciation for night. Somehow it is easier to dissect my feelings, because there is so much waiting underneath my skin. For whatever reason, the darkness allows me to examine my thoughts in a totally different manner than in in the daytime. This probably relates to hormones or something, but there is no mistaking that standing in the darkness produces a different reaction that standing in the sunlight.

Therefore, “nothing is as it seems” because time is a weird but terrifically important component of our lives. If there was no time, our sense of the world would be tilted one hundred and eighty degrees. While I do believe that time is necessary, I think that it is also nice to forget it exists once in a while, so that we are not focused or worried on what is to come.

The second stanza of this poem shifts from the perspective on time to something a little more nuanced. At nighttime it is easier for me to open up about my problems and worries, and I believe this rings true for some of you as well. However, some choose silence instead, as the night opens a new cavern for them to dissect the meaning of life.

The most dramatic lines of this poem, “yet no matter your side / your heart will bleed violence,” are not meant to avow images of bloodshed and gore. Instead, these lines are to dramatize the concept of humanity. For me, the darkness exposes some of my deep-seated flaws, as I am more willing to share who I am with others and myself. When we allow our hearts to open up, we can see that we are damaging ourselves just as much as the natural world can.

Violence has two main definitions. 1) Behavior involving physical force intended to hurt, damage, or kill someone or something. 2) Strength of emotion or an unpleasant or destructive natural force.

In the darkness, my heart bleeds violence, against my own sins and my own shortcomings. It is at night when I see who I really am. The absence of light, funnily enough, exposes me more than the day ever could.


THANK YOU.

Thanks for reading another poem from yours truly. I am excited for the next posts that will come on this blog, and in the meantime I am enjoying yours as well. Stay safe, and have a beautiful week.

Until next time,

-K.

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Los Angeles, California (Perspective from the Griffith Observatory // April 2019)
poetry

if i could (a poem)

if i could pinch my skin
and start again, would i?

if i could go back in time,
would i press play or rewind?

if i could cash in a wish,
would it be sticky or sweet?

if i could change the little
things, would i still be me?


AN EXPLANATION.

Welp, here we go!

This poem comes from a stormy summer night in my hometown. After weeks of writing nothing, I was suddenly struck with a desperation to put my words on paper. Those nights are the best kind of nights, aren’t they?

The truth is that we all reflect on the things we’ve done and how we could have done them differently. Maybe there is a monumental event in your life that has you stunned into silence: Would I have been happier if I’d just…

And my response to that question is: It shouldn’t matter. You can’t change what you’ve done, though you can change what you’ll do tomorrow. When we devote our time and energy to past misdoings, we’re setting ourselves up for future failure. We can take a moment to reflect, sure, but that should only be to set up the game plan for what you’re going to get done tomorrow.

Be yourself. That’s my only request!

Until next time,

-K. ❤

P.S. If I could change things, I wouldn’t. There’s a plan for what’s to come.

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Germantown, TN // May 2019